More than a list of nouns
Language transfers meaning
From one heart to another,
Informing, questioning,
Encouraging.
Last week
At our four-party dinner table
Our friend said, “We ate
At the best Thai restaurant
At Main and Greene.”
“I know the spot! Next door
Is a barbecue shack
I can’t name…
Sometimes our daughter
Rhonda meets us there.”
Then he uttered
His single words,
Added gestures.
Name…SameThing…Ugh…
Charleston…Holly…Jim…Ahw…
Aw…SameThing…Four…More.
When he tries to speak
I no longer want to guess.
Thirty-four years since that stroke,
Yet again, I am trying to
Fit together the puzzle
Of his thought.
Aha, I’ve got it! Sticky Fingers,
The barbecue place in Charleston
Where we ate three years ago
With our other daughter Holly,
Her husband Jim.
I say, “Sticky Fingers”.
He pushes his notepad toward me.
I write “Sticky Fingers,”
He smiles.
In his aphasia group
On Monday, he may say:
Charleston…Holly…EatIt…
Ahw…Longtime…ThisOne…
SameThing…uh…eat…
Then press his fingers together,
Hold as if they will not come apart,
Hoping they will say Sticky Fingers…
Maybe not.
For one small second
I imagined
He would tell our friends tonight
About another time and place
When he and I shared a table
Candlelight and music witnessing
Our soft voices and bright eyes
Focused solely on each other.
Tonight he pockets pad and pen
Then scans the room,
Flashing his cheery smile
To all who look his way.
I feel alone.
He lifts his glass,
Sips tonight’s sweet tea.
I paint a smile across my face
Straining to remember
To be grateful
For our efforts.
Published in Stroke Connect Magainxe of The American Heart Association March/April 2008
